Retarded Grandparents

After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school. One essay sounds just like Kings Point complete with golf cart and the guard at the gate:

The child wrote:

“We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded.

“They ride around on their bicycles and wear name tags because they don’t know who they are anymore.

“They go to a building called a wrecked center, but they must have got it fixed because it is okay now, and do exercises there, but they don’t do them very well. There is a swimming pool too, but in it, they all jump up and down with hats on.

“At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out.

“They go cruising in their golf carts. Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And, they eat the same thing every night: Early Birds. Some of the people can’t get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked center and call it pot luck.

“My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too. When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out so they can visit their grandchildren.”

Ok, so we wear name tags, ride golf carts, no one cooks, and all of us wear hats in the pool (’cause very few really swim, most of us just soak and want to keep the sun out of our eyes), but most of us are retired NOT retarded.

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