Back in December, Sophie tasted her first truly quality beef. I went to a Christmas prime rib dinner and brought her quite a bit for her. She loved it. Two times since then, I’ve fixed myself a steak and I’ve given her some.

Today I bought myself a lovely sirloin filet less than 3/4’s of a pound and 1 1/2 inches thick. I cut it in half and even half was more than I could eat tonight. Sophie knew from the time I took it out to the grill that her favorite meal was being prepared.

How would she know yummy steak was being prepped?

I didn’t fix much to go with it. I just had an ear of corn on the cob and some moscato wine. It was a great dinner, and Sophie’s sleeping it off.

I rarely leave my condo. Last time I went out was Wednesday, the 24th, when I brought the garbage can in.

It’s extremely hot … nearly 100! Why go out unless you have to? I have no real reason to face the heat and the risk of the virus.

Today is the 26th of June. Sunday, the 21st, I worked at the Squad and filled up my tank with gas. I’ve only out gone after the mail one time.

Starting on Friday, the 19th, I didn’t have my golfcart but I finally got it back on Wednesday, again the 24th. Funny but I missed having it but haven’t used it. It’s just been so hot!!!

When I see old photos of John and me it looks like we were over-the-top happy. It’s true. Our life together was blissful.

I can honestly say we were as happy as any couple I ever came in touch with. I don’t remember an argument (well, maybe one) but we resolved everything quickly. Life was so good!

I don’t expect to find that kind of happiness again. I know I was lucky to have it one time in my life.

In fact, to be honest, I don’t want another relationship like what I shared with John. I’ll always have those memories as his wife. Somehow, aiming for a similar relationship would reduce what John and I shared. I am content to remember.

Some folks feel that in a few months, life will go back to normal.

Others believe the end is near. The fatalists see the whole covid-19 situation and the race riots as signs from God that the end of the time is approaching.

I want to go back to December 2019, when Kelly was here. We had such a nice visit. There was no fear connected with going out in public. Now I panic when I think about folks being close.

Living in Kings Point has always been non-stop fun. Now it’s necessary to “social distance” (at least six feet apart). No dances, no pizza party, no Kentucky Derby party, no St. Patrick’s Day event.

I think about the differences six months have made.

I am sure that life is forever changed. Call me a pessimist but I don’t think we’ll go back to the time before the virus. I’m fairly certain it’s not the end of society. God wouldn’t punish us that way.

I stay inside most of the time. I work at the Emergency Squad and sometimes grocery shop but on average I probably go out about every five days and wear a surgical mask.

I heard China may be aiming for our electrical system with an EMP attack. I hope not. We’re dealing with enough.

Wednesdays have become my favorite days!

I have been enjoying on-line concerts by Jay Ungar and Molly Mason. They warm my heart.

Sophie seems to enjoy it when I hold her and dance around the room.

This whole Covid-19 virus situation is unbelievable. Six months ago, who’d have thought we’d be enduring the confinement and loss of so many activities that were important to us?

Life goes on and at some point, our lives will become “normal.” It’ll be a “new normal.” We all know we’ll never go back to the way things were.

I often wonder how John would handle all the changes. Maybe he’d do better. I am sure we’d do better as a couple. The two of us spent time in the Upper Peninsula where we’d be completely alone. True, it was only days at a time and not weeks extending to months, but we never had a problem being isolated. We did decide that we didn’t want to plan on that kind of life for our retirement years. Here I am faced with it, and I don’t have him to help me through being alone. Sometimes it’s really difficult.

Yes, I love to read. Yes, there are other things I could do alone. But the situation has changed me into a person who accepts boredom. I find myself occupied with online card games and puzzles. I look out the window a lot but I don’t go out.

If it was cooler, I would probably use my patio more but at 90+ degrees, it’s more comfortable inside.

I keep thinking that eventually I’ll go to the pool. The limitations make it undesirable but eventually I hope to go and float around. (I hope to go to the Nantucket Pool but the opening of it has been postponed as they complete some repairs.)

My idea of finding a “guy” to do things with has kinda tanked. I won’t hold my breath looking for a fellow. I will continue to glance through the Our Time possibilities but so far it’s been a dead end.

And businesses are finding the new climate is impossible. One of my favorite restaurants, Sweet Tomatoes, has closed for good. Someone said there’ll be no buffets. I doubt that our Michigan Club parties will endure. Dances are impossible.

I wonder if, with the new “social distancing” requirements, folks will ever get together to have children.

I found out that the guy I wrote about died on Thursday December, 3rd.

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I’m 78 but tonight I ran into a situation I thought only happened to young, virgin girls. I had a guy tell me he wants to take me to bed.

We haven’t even kissed and with the current virus situation, I don’t want to risk spreading germs. I’ve only had him visit my place once before.

I thought at our age, love-making would be limited to hugging and making out… NOT SEX.

He said he doesn’t want to waste his time nor mine.

I asked if just cuddling would be enough but he stated it’s not something he’d consider. (A waste of time.)

I had thought of him as a friend, but I’m not ready to go to bed with anyone. I don’t think I ever will be ready to do “that.” And even if I was “ready,” I now know he’s not the right guy. He insulted me by feeling I would so cheaply let him into my body and I won’t forget it.

The sexual situation bothered me so much I talked to my friend Pat about it and asked her if all senior women have to worry about old guys wanting to take them to bed. She said it happens but generally guys allow time for romantic feelings to grow. What I experienced was not common. She encouraged me to keep looking. There’s a guy for me someplace. I hope.

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Since that visit, I have received five phone calls from him. The first one I answered but quickly excused myself. The others I didn’t answer. And now I’ve blocked his number so they don’t even ring here. (But I can see that he tried. I wonder how he feels about the block.)

I am a lady. I plan to stay proper. I don’t need to feel dirtied by a man who thinks that two visits with me allows him “bedding” privileges. No way!!! I don’t care to ever speak to him again.

With the Covid-19 virus causing us to be isolated, I have been passing my alone time shopping on line. Now I’m over-stocked with stuff that I’ll store away. I have everything I “need” plus extras of most items.

Well, almost everything… The other day I realized I’ve been unhappy every time I take a shower because my shower cap is crap! I know most folks don’t bother with a cap, but my hair is fairly long and thick and when it gets wet it takes a while to dry. I’m an evening shower person and the elastic has broken so my hair gets wet just before I head to bed. It’s frustrated me to have this problem repeatedly. Several times I’ve purchased replacement caps at Walmart and at CVS but they’ve been too small or “lined” (and I hate lined shower caps).

So the other day I went on Amazon and found $3 shower caps that are perfect. I bought five! I’m a happy woman. I purr every evening at shower time. They have made my get-ready-for-bed time much more pleasurable.

Isn’t it funny that a little thing like a shower cap with elastic that works can please me so completely.

Life is good.