Since my loss of John, I head to bed about 10:30 p.m. and usually fall asleep fairly quickly but I wake up about 1:30 a.m. From then until about 4:00 a.m. I’m lucky if I doze. Too much time to think about the change in my life. Almost always I wake up about 4:00. Sometimes I’m able to sleep a bit more but I’ve been getting up about 6:30.

I have no energy nor motivation. Yes, I want to be back in Florida but I don’t have the house ready for selling. I need to get busy.

I can think of lots of excuses: my back aches, I have to go to shopping, it’s too hot, I don’t feel good.

Little by little I’m gaining ground. I think the best solution is to pick an area and finish it completely. First I’ll tackle the great room, then the dining room, and the master bedroom. When finished those projects will make a decent impact. Tomorrow I hope to work on these rooms. If I take the next week to organize and clean the first floor, hopefully it’ll feel cleaner and less cluttered.